Tag: Kids

mattering marinade

~ trythisathomekids ~ Leave a comment

These posts won’t all circle back to Adam Grant, but we have really enjoyed his podcast – Worklife. We also recently listened to an interview he did for Goop, in which he talks about the concept of ‘mattering’.  Sheryl Sandberg’s account of how this concept helped her and her family, got to the crux of it for us.

Sociologists describe mattering as the belief that other people notice you, care about you and rely on you. It’s the answer to a vital question that all children ask about their place in the world starting as toddlers, and continuing into and beyond adolescence: Do I make a difference to others?  Forbes, 2017

For a more academic take, here’s an article by Gregory Elliott, Suzanne Kao and Ann Marie Grant, which builds on the construct of ‘mattering’ formally introduced by Rosenberg and McCullough (1981).

We want to nurture future robot bosses who know they matter. Activity please!

Try this at home kids 

Take a cue from Adam Grant (https://goop.com/thepodcast/) and ask your kid(s) for their advice on how to handle something you’re anxious about.  This could be speaking or performing in public, or something you’re going to try for the first time.  This is a way of showing your kid(s) that you’re looking to them, relying on them, that they matter to you.

Bonus points if you find an opportunity to turn it around and play their advice back to them in the future (i.e. they find themselves in a similar situation and you remind them what their advice was to you,and how it helped you ).

A good trythisathomekids to keep in mind for dinner table conversations and car trips too, to help your kids feel they matter to you in everyday, and more more profound ways too.

Special thanks (again) to Adam Grant.

Postscript 

Here’s Adam Grant speaking some more on the subject.

super bursti

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Creativity is a sought after thing. Creativity and its close companion ‘innovation’ are key drivers of many thriving businesses.  Creativity and innovation also seem likely to be even more important in the future, in part because they seem less prone to automation (AI advances pending!).

In his great podcast Worklife, Adam Grant talks about the concept of ‘burstiness’, a way creativity can happen in teams or groups.

Burstiness is when everybody is speaking and responding to each other in a short amount of time instead of having it drawn out over a long period of time.”

“Burstiness is like the best moments in improv jazz. Someone plays a note, someone else jumps in with a harmony, and pretty soon, you have a collective sound that no one planned. Most groups never get to that point, but you know burstiness when you see it. At The Daily Show, the room just literally sounds like it’s bursting with ideas (Worklife – Season 1, Episode 2)

Christoph Riedl and Anita Williams Woolley (interviewed by Adam for the podcast) have written this article on team-based problem solving, including ‘burstiness’.

Given the value of creativity and the often team-based nature of our working lives, nurturing some burstiness in our kids (and ourselves) sounds like the way to go.

But where to start? In his Worklife podcast Adam talks about the importance of ‘psychological safety’.  In short,  people need to feel comfortable and willing to take a social risk to encourage ‘burstiness’.  This sounds like a good a foundation to build and keep in mind.

Try this at home kids

To help nurture robot bosses equipped for ‘burstiness’- of the best improve-jazz-variety – here’s an idea to try at home with the kids(s), or on your next car trip.

A group of three or four kids aged between four and seven seems to work best.

Start by explaining that you’re going to play a game, where you’ll all be working together to tell a strange and excellent story.

The winner is the person the team decides has planted the seed(s) for the ‘best’ character or plot twist, which inspired others and encouraged others to jump in. For a sporting analogy, it is the person who sets the team up to score or the person voted ‘best and fairest’.

Make it clear up-front that:

  • the more imagination the better
  • there is no wrong answer
  • everyone should feel free to jump in and build on the story or characters, this is a team effort
  • interruptions are fine (good even), but everyone should have a little bit of space to get their idea out.

To get started, asking one of the kids in the group to kick-off with a joke or a funny story often does the trick.

Be ready to jump in and lead by example.

Tip: aim for the improbable and to entertain, make supporting each other central.  

Special thanks to Adam Grant for the inspiration.

Postscript 

Officially ‘burstiness’, ‘swarming’ at Brink (tweet below) and ‘super bursti’ here at trythisathomekids.com. A great concept resonating.